Ass-Crafters

Minecraft is the new indie game going around. It's a game where you're a miner. You mine blocks. Its a blocky, randomly generaated world with lava and water and enemies and gold and all that epic stuff. There are even trees, and they grow.

It's still in Alpha, which is like pre-pre release, so most games aren't even announced to the public at this stage. Well, minecraft is both announced and out there, being played and bought (Half price in alphaa, three-fourths when it moves up to beta, and then full price at release) by many many people. It has about as much functionality as many normal, full priced games, and with a big haloween update coming up soon, which includes and ENTIRELY NEW FUCKING DIMENSION OF TITS AND LAVA AND AWESOME (okay, maybe not tits. But we can hope, right Notch?). Okay, so Notch, the guy who makes the game, does a lot of updating. New block type, new item, new whatevers, it's an update. He has Secret Friday updates, where he updates, hands out the files (every update after you buy the game is free) and leaves you to find the new whizz-bang. So yeah, he updates a lot.

He's also swedish, I think. But whutever.

Now this notchman puts a lot of his time into this game. He has an entire community of fans, a brilliant game, and wild ambitions. And now, he's releasing a mega-haloween-update. Its fucking huge, and it includes stuff that people have been begging for (or at least contemplating) for ages. He's nice enough to put it in. Well, it's not really nicety, it's simple economics. But the development process is really interactive, and the community plays a huge part in forming the game. In fact, I think at one point there was a guy from the forums that made a zombie-pigman texture, and its set to be included in the update.

This mega-update has put a halt to the slew of weekly mini updates for a month or so, because this shit is huge. And fair enough. I mean, he's condensing this all, bugtesting it and pouring away hours into this, just for you people, half of you that probably pirated that shit anyway. But he's not too concerned about piracy, because if you love the game, you love him and its only ten fucking dollars people.

Stopping updates for a while to release this update seems like a reasonable idea, and all of the mine-crafters, or mine-craftians, agree. Well, almost all of them.

Some of them are raging dicks. I shit you not, some people have a huge problem with this.

Some people were so annoyed they DDOSed (denial of serive attack) his servers and websites, making them completley useless for a while. Then they sent this message:

" Minecraft is currently experiencing a stimulation provided by us.

It's purpose is to send Notch a clear message of how the future of minecraft will turn out unless he gets to work, namely by influencing the amount of sales taking place, due to the attacks.

Start providing your customers with the updates that you promise them.

We have roughly 83,000 bots available, and preserved for this seizure, we could if we wanted to keep this going for weeks, however we have decided to give it a week, and see whether or not your attitude, and commitment will change, we believe it will when money stops rolling in for the time being...

anyhow, no we're not from roblox, or any other minecraft clone, not to mention none of us have been around 4chan for years, and nor has any real 4channers for that matter, its all newfags now, and has been for quite a few years. Hurr we're a bunch of fags who don't understand economics, time management or game development"

Well, they said almost all of that, aside from everything after the "hurr", but it's true. Listen the the sheer arrogance of these arseholes. Read it.

Look ,if you have a problem with the man taking time of from regular uptates, TALK THE THE MAN. He'd be more than happy to let something slip your way, like sneak peeks or even little updates. He's a nice man, and if you were that desperate, he's help you out.

But if you think that attacking his website is going to solve anything, you're a fucktard. He is an indie game developer. He has a limited ammount of time. He can only work on one thing at a time and his work is giong to be two things: Work on the game, or work on the website and community.

If he needs to get shit running on his website, he can't work on the game. You are slowing the entire process down.

Also, lets take another look at that statement, "a simulation". It's not an accurate simulation at all, since most people are reasonable and can understand why he's not spoonfeeding you arseholes constand updates. HE HAS OTHER WORK TO DO. FUCK YOURSELF WITH A RAKE. People will still buy the game, and your righteous assholery solves nothing. At all.

Let him get back to doing what he loves, and we love. Take your primitive understanding of people, time management, economics and life in general, and shove it somewhere painful. You are not entitled to any of this shit, you didn't even pay the full price, and nothing either of these parties signed ever dicated that constant updates would be an all-prevelant reality. He's doing his best, and you are happily crushing his spirit. There is just so much wrong with this attack, I must dub you all Ass-Crafters. You craft ass.

Fuck you, ass crafters, and take your DDOS with you. Nobody loves you.

Heh, Ass-Crafters.