I Fucking Hate: The trendy emo/goth scene.

Go suck a fucking whale penis. You're not sad, mad or different. You're just attention-whoring.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Anthony: Political Correctness

Well, it's a subject that needs to be adressed.
I guess it's best tackled by launching straight at it, so here I go.

All men were created equal.
All women were created equal.
Men and women are equal in rights.
Black and white people are equal in rights.
The key word here is? Go on. GUESS.

EQUAL.

Capital letters.

EQUAL.

So why the fuck do these people always pull the 'minority' card?

Wait, you thought this was about people being dicks to blacks/women/others? Nope. That's a well covered subject already. I'm just as sick, however, of people who cry "Discrimintation" when a black person is arrested on suspicion, or people who let an Iraqi man beat his wife or daughter for not adherring to their religion, despite the fact they are NOT in their homeland anymore.

You change locations, you change laws. You beat someone in Britan, or the US, you face the penalty, no matter the reason. (Well, not quite.)
But suddenly, believing in a different mystical cloud-lord or having different customs lets you walk all over our law? I'm all for tollerance, but this is going too far.
OUR country, OUR rules. Don't like it? Go back to your OWN country. Rough it out. We go to your country and respect your customs. We are EQUAL, and when on someone elses home turf, you defer to them.

Women keep pulling the 'chauvanism' card, and making life inconvenient for men. You don't get the job?
Discrimination.
Come on. Stop with that shit, please.

I've got some issiues with this whole 'Political Correctness', obviously. Some of these are to di with the fact that only MINORITIES can be discriminated against. Or at least that's how it seems.
(An interesting note is that in the Apartheid, blacks outnumbered the whites.)
Blacks or Asians cannot be racist to whites.
Women can harrass the men as much as they want
Other religions can put down atheists, or Muslims can put down Christians.


Also, what's the deal with not being able to say 'disabled', 'retarded' or 'crippled'? You have to say 'disadvantaged' or 'differently abled'.

Dude, you have no LEGS. That's not differently abled. You have NO LEGS. That's disabled. You have NO ability to use your legs, 'cause you DONT have them. What's the problem with me saying that word? I'm not trying to be offensive.

In England, the public and open cellebration of Christmas is being limited because of 'religious tollerance'. No, fuck off. That's just being pansies. I can accept that other people have different beliefs, and can understand that in their country, it would be a bit iffy to openly celebrate your own religion, but only in some places.
But you stupid spineless dicks are banning the celebration of your OWN religion in your OWN godamn country. What the fuck is wrong with you? You ENCOURAGE them to cellebrate their festivals in your own streets, and repress your citizens?

You cant call people 'Garbagemen'. They are 'Refuse Collector Operatives'.
You can't say black. You have to say African American.

Baa Baa African American sheep, anyone?

And I quote from YahooAnswers:
"The U.K. Government has recently Paid off Over 2,000 Prison in-mates (Who were Junkies when they were convicted),because they were forced to Go COLD TURKEY whilst in jail!!"

He does not lie.

"My daughter was a prison nurse, and she told me they're not allowed to call prisoners "inmates", they had to refer to them as "clients". This is in Canada."

THEIR IS NO BALLANCE HERE!
If someone robs your house, and hurts themselves, they can sue you for reckless endangerment or some similar charge.

You can't cellebrate Halloween in nurseries, because it might SCARE them. God forbid we scare them with fake costumes, and completley ignore all those fairytales that stem from violent folk lore.

Read this: http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article71944.ece

It's fucking scary.

LEARN TO SUCK IT UP, people.

You, you're fat, not horizontally challenged, or dietarily impaired.
You, you're a ginger. Deal with it.
You're black.
You're a woman. You hit me, I hit you. Deal with it.
You're an old person. You're funny because you're fragile.
You're a delinquent. Your appearance does not matter.
You believe things differently to me. Good for you. Stop repressing me. Why can't I fight back?

So, in conclusion, fuck off, government. Fuck off, Human Rights activists. Fuck off, and let people be PEOPLE.

THE END.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Anthony Yells About: Yelling about shit.

When I publicly declare my love for all things random, or yell at birds, I get ridiculed. This is, of course, to be expected. However, this has not stopped me from becoming the founding father of the great Colony of B Block (Well, not really.) and being an amazingly popular (kinda... sorta... maybe) and seriously awesome (Okay, no.) and have a harem the length of a train (Okay, now we all know I'm just screwing around).

It irks me that people mock me, but not because of the reasons you would think. I mean, why, if I were annoyed by the ridicule and disrespect of others, would I be the person I am today? (I bathe in your mild discontent and irritation.) No, I wouldn't. As I stand now, I am happy to be the object of ridicule to many, many people for two reasons.

1: I don't know most of them.
2: I don't like or care about most of them.

Life became so much simpler when I realised that most people I see don't give a shit about me, and will never see me again. (This falls short when talking to any girls, any time, however. Hence the lack of a train-length harem.) People just don't ever seem to realize that most people don' care/matter to their own lives, and that's probably a good thing, since there would be a whole load more crazy people out there, and the last thing that this world needs is more nutwhacks out there, eh?

But the reason (finally) I am irked by these people is that they think I'm just stupid. And when they meet me again, (rare) they express that. That's the only time my grand plan falls down. When stupid people think I'm stupid.

You see, some people (AKA people I tolerate) are understanding enough to realise that I both am just having fun, don't like most other people, and am in serious need of some therapy.
The other set of people just seem to be intent on making fun of me. Actually making a conscious effort to be dicks and douches to some guy who laughs around for most of his life.

It usually ends with them laughing and walking away, not realizing that I have just insulted them in some witty and nonobvious (or sometimes VERY obvious) way. This, however, is a hollow victory for me, and a full, tasty three course loss for them. This irks me.

I am reduced to three options:

1: Yelling at them until they either cry or understand me and my motives.
2: Hitting them untill they either cry or understand me and my motives.
3: Giving up and realizing they will never cry or understand my motives.

Guess which option I pick? (Hint: Hitting [stupid] people gets you into trouble.)

Ponder upon that, and then realize that this was all a joke.




Or, you know, maybe it wasn't.
No, of course it wasn't. I wouldn't do a thing like that, I know you all.

...I think.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

ANTHONY: Music and Laughter, the two greatest remedies

Well, it's me, and as you can see I have scored a great victory for all mankind. Alex, AKA Dowlaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand, is now blogging, and as you can most likely see (unless you have crippling sight disorder and are having this read to you, in which case, well, sucks to be you.) this is indeed a great and holy thing. No, seriously.

Todays post, (in an attempt to upstage Alex) is threefold.

First and not quite formost, is the topic of manical laughter. You know, the kind you get in movies where the bad guy has just revealed his evil plan? Yea, that laughter. Best laughs ever. And you know what? It sounds even better in real life. Like, onehundedfold better. Add that to the facts that it is both incredibly theraputic, ever so tension releasing and scary to most sane people withing hearing radius, and there's just no reason NOT to manically laugh any time you feel like you've scored even a minor victory against the forces of not-so-evil, AKA those who make you do more work.
Sure, people think you're mad, but while they're busy fleeing for their lives/mocking you, you are happier, less tense and feeling rather too happy. Who's the winner now?
(Answer to rhetorical question: Satan. He's got a copyright on that laugh, and you'll pay for it in full when you die.) And since I can't find an aproppriate topic bridge, I'm just going to skip directly to the next bit. You can pretend. Use your imaginations. Go on. Use them.


Secondly, the probably ever-covered and worn topic of musical jerks. And I'm not talking about the artists, I'm talking about the followers. Just because you're not hardcore enough, or don't buy all their merchandice, you're not a true fan.

Actually, I've probably been through all this before in a previous blog post, so I'll cut this short and say that you probably all know about these people, and should give them a kick in the nadgers from me.

And also, to express my fustration, here is your daily FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!

Enjoy.

Oh, and thirdly, today is my last day as a single man, Kate's friends have set up our wedding for tomorrow. I have plans to disrupt the ceremony and escape with my freedom, but all the same, wish me luck.
Or you could, you know, attend and bring some popcorn.

Monday, September 7, 2009

People I hate: The one-sided conversationalist BY ALEX

Hello again,
Following in traditional innovative ramblings style, I have decided to do a post based around people I hate. You would've thought that Anthony would've put them all down in his comic entitled "People I hate" or something along those lines, but no, I have another one to add.

The one-sided conversationalist

What is a one-sided conversationalist? Let me give you an overview. A friend of mine (chances are if you are reading this blog it's not you I'm speaking of) is a one-sided conversationalist. A typical conversation would go like this:

Anonymous friend (hereby referred to as AF): "Hey Alex!"

Me: "Yeah?"
Thinking: "Oh no, not this again..."
Interest levels: 6/10

AF: "My [insert relation here] is [insert compliment here]!"

Me: "Sweet."
Thinking: "I wouldn't really know, as I've never met any of your relatives, so this isn't really any sort of good conversation..."
Interest levels: 1/10

The conversation continues in this general manner for about an hour before either he or I or both decide to continue elsewhere. Now some people who do this might not do it on purpose, and I have accidently done it on various occasions but when it happens this often there's obviously something strange. Here's another branching form of the one-sided conversationalist: The 'funny man'.

Funny Man (hereby referred to as FM): "Sup Alex!"

Me: "Hey!"
Thinking: "Crap! here comes FM and I'm in the worst of moods."
Interest: 6/10 declining fast to a 4/10

FM: "[insert remark of reasonable wit here]"

Me: "[insert feeble forced laugh here]"
Thinking: "God I hate laughing..."
Interest: -1/10

Now don't get me wrong. The funny man might actually be funny. I'm just not the laughing type. I mean, I do laugh when I hear a really good joke, or watch a reasonably funny movie, and sometimes when other people laugh I manage to laugh along, but when it's just me, it's painful.

In conclusion, I hate one-sided conversationalists. They are just generally painful. I will blog again soon, most likely on another newsly topic. Sadly, I don't hate as many other people as Anthony just yet.

~Alex

Saturday, September 5, 2009

A ban on public smoking? Sounds good, eh? ~By Alex

Hey, Alex here. I've been instructed by The Gremlin to do some blogging on his blog. And, I've decided to open with the traditional complaint (also known as Complaint I or The Complaint); A complaint over the news.


Anyone who watches the TV news (I'm guessing not many) would have heard the other night that a certain western-NSW town has plans to ban public smoking. Completely. Now, many people would approve this, thinking "Great, no more cancer. We're now safe from all the evils of the world, and the filthy, evil smokers can do nothing about it." But just think about it for a second. Imagine you are a smoker. Every day you participate in a habit that you most likely can't wait to break, you fork out thousands a year for cigarettes (most of which is tax, so if you hate paying taxes, how much must smokers?) Sure they can quit, and many do, but it's not easy in any respect.And, before someone tells me "These taxes smokers pay are used up by them in years to come when they eventually get lung cancer and die," let me tell you the truth. Only 1 in 3 people who smoke die of it. That's a lot, but when you add up all the tax, the tax goes elsewhere as well. Life sucks as a smoker then, eh? But even if you are a non-smoker (like me) then we shouldn't treat them like rats. If you ban public smoking completely, you are essentially making life as difficult as you can for smokers. Unless of course they plan to quit, in which case they probably will.


Let's look at the best scenario here. The plan is implemented. Most people are happy about it. Some die-hard smokers leave the town, but they are replaced by some couples with small children who believe that 'the air is cleaner'. These couples leave when they realise the lack of various facilities in a small town, and the town has a small decline in population. In summary, very little happens.


Now let's look at the worst case scenario. The plan is implemented. It is an immediate total and complete success. Why is this so bad? Let me tell you:

The state of NSW decides to implement it, soon to be followed by the rest of Australia.


Soon enough, the sale, possession and consumption of tobacco is deemed illegal.

Not a safe move. For one, 3.5 million people (as of 2005, source: ABS.gov.au) going through withdrawal symptoms can't be good. Many would oppose the bans, and probably take violent action. Cigarettes will be sold illegally, and will become the next illicit drug to see a rise in consumption. You'll see dodgy looking characters lining the streets with cartons of Winfield Reds hanging out of their trench-coats as they try to not look suspicious. I'm sure most non-smokers would prefer public smoking to a rise in crime, dodgy 'dealers' and of course, a giant tax hike. Who's going to pay the smoker's hefty taxes now that they're no longer allowed to smoke? The answer is simple; everyone else.


As for medical statistics, as more and more sellers of illicit tobacco start to run out of stockpiled cartons, they will turn to growing and making your own. As such, cigarettes would most likely be of worse quality and made with less tobacco leading to a probable increase in deaths from various cancers, as well as deaths from smoking in general. More funding would be needed for hospitals, and as such, taxes would go up again. All so that when you walk down the street over the course of the day, you don't get some "inconsiderate" smoker leaving a cloud of smoke around a small area, causing you to get mildly inconvenienced. Let me ask you, which do you prefer?


Finally, let me just say most blog posts I make are not as serious as this. This is just one which raises some interesting questions. But remember, if you ever have to vote on something like this, remember what I told you.


Any questions or anything, please leave comments.


~Alex

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Why I am better off angry.

According to an ever helpfull follower, I blog better when I am angry. Well, due to that, and the fact that after, well, about a month, I have something worth yelling about. You know, actually yelling, not just standing in the corner and mumbling quietly about livers.

Its time to start a new traditon: The I FUCKING HATE section of the blog, enwhich I post about those I hate. I'll try to put it on a widget seperate from my actual post, maybe on the side of the page. Look out for it sometime soon.

But, just for reference, I fucking hate people that can't hold an argument, and act like total pricks of you disagree with anything you say *COUGHJOEPRINGLECOUGH*.